Every dog owner will someday experience a time of sorrow that, hopefully, occurs after years of joy with our beloved dogs. While nothing can speed up the healing process \u2014 which, indeed, is a process, not something one magically \u201cgets over\u201d after a certain amount of time \u2014 many have found memorializing their dog to be comforting.<\/p>\n
There is absolutely no single, right way to do this, reminds Reverend Kaleel Sakakeeny, an animal chaplain and credentialed pet loss and grief counselor in Boston. \u201cEach of us mourns and memorializes in his or her own way depending on so many factors from faith, religion, intensity of the human-animal bond, stage of life the pet parent is in, how the pet passed, etc.\u201d<\/p>\n
Again, take your time and do what feels right to you. \u201cAnd it definitely is a process \u2014 and not one that is always linear. It\u2019s critical for the healing process to move from grief to mourning, which is externalizing\/memorializing the pain and sadness so we can begin to move forward. NEVER to move on; to move forward,\u201d adds Rev. Kaleel, who is also a professional life coach.<\/p>\n
- \n
- \n
Incorporate ashes<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Over the years it has become more common to keep the ashes of a beloved pet, as well as using some of the ashes to create different memorial items.<\/p>\n
\u201cUrns and urn jewelry seem to be what most people think about,\u201d says Coleen Ellis, a pet loss author, consultant and speaker who oversees Two Hearts Pet Loss Center in Texas, but options don\u2019t end there. \u201cOutside rock urns, mixing ashes with Let Your Love Grow to create a very nutrient-rich product for flowers and trees, portraits painted using the pet\u2019s ashes or even shooting the pet\u2019s ashes into space or turning the pet\u2019s ashes into a coral reef for the ocean are some beautiful and creative ideas.\u201d<\/p>\n
Rev. Kaleel offers a caveat to consider. \u201cI advise not to spread all the ashes because we move, change locations and don\u2019t want all the pet\u2019s ashes somewhere else. People have been grateful for this guidance. We need to keep the ashes with us, some of them anyway, and having spread ashes far and wide can leave us bereft.\u201d<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido1-424x600.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
PetBar Pendant<\/strong> (hollowed pendant that holds cremains)<\/em>; remembarcollection.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Craft a jewel<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
There are many different ways jewelry can include part of your pet. Options can include turning the ashes into a diamond, creating jewelry with the pet\u2019s nose or paw print on it or wearing a locket with your dog\u2019s photo or a tuft of fur, perhaps even engraved with his name or initial.<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido2-501x600.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
Teeny Tiny Paw Necklace<\/strong>; pawsomecouture.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Picture a memory<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Doubtless, you have lots of pictures of your dog. Many different companies print a photo book that you can fill with images, as well as stories about your dog \u2014 funny things he did, all his nicknames or who his favorite furry friends were. I created one of these for our dog Medusa through Costco\u2019s photo site (above, left). You can find photo books at Shutterfly, Minted, Personalization Mall or shops on Etsy. You can also go smaller scale and get a personalized frame for your absolutely favorite photo.<\/p>\n
As with any of the items on this list, don\u2019t pressure yourself to take on a photo-based project. As I\u2019ve experienced with those Facebook Memories, seeing images from years ago of either our beloved dogs Axel or Medusa sometimes makes me smile; sometimes they make my eyes sweaty. I created the Medusa photo book for my husband for Father\u2019s Day, which was about six months after she passed. It took him a long time to actually be able to look through it; don\u2019t be offended if the recipient of a photo, or any gift, is on a different bereavement timetable than you.<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido3-600x293.png\")
Create and print a book with images and stories about your dog.<\/em> \u00a0Above created through Costco\u2019s photo site<\/strong>; costcophotocenter.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n ![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido3-2-600x485.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
Without You Custom Photo Art by Sara Hicks Malone<\/strong>;\u2004minted.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Hold a memorial service<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
\u201cWith increasing frequency, I am finding that many grieving pet owners are open to the concept of hosting a memorial or a celebration of life for a pet,\u201d says Maryglenn Warnock, a certified pet bereavement counselor and ordained pet funeral officiant\/pet chaplain based in Nashville. \u201cI have long questioned why we celebrate our human companions after death but typically don\u2019t celebrate our furry companions. I know I am not alone in my belief that pets are family, too.\u201d<\/p>\n
Coleen concurs, also embracing the model many follow for humans. \u201cAbsolutely, rituals are one of the most powerful ways to honor not only a life and love shared but to bring people together who might have also loved the pet. I believe in the power of what we do for humans: a visitation or wake. Taking time during the service to remember the special moments, share photos, have a toast \u2026 whatever it was the family did together throughout the life of the animal is the perfect thing to do for a service or to share with the eulogy. Get the entire family involved.\u201d<\/p>\n
Jenna Blum, Boston-based bestselling author, found herself getting her entire neighborhood involved. \u201cWhen my black Lab, Woodrow, passed at age 15, we had a memorial for him about a week after, on the bench across the street from our downtown Boston apartment where he and I spent much of his last seven months. We had Woodrow\u2019s photo in a frame, LED candles, champagne to celebrate his life, bacon\u2014because he loved it\u2014and many beautiful ladies, just as Woodrow, the \u2018George Clooney of Dogs\u2019 would have wanted, singing Amazing Grace and reading poetry for him. Days later, the photo and candles were still there \u2014 and people left flowers, rocks and notes for him, like \u2018Dear Woodrow and family, we will miss seeing you here at the bench!\u2019 I saved them all.\u201d<\/p>\n
As part of her healing process, Jenna wrote Woodrow on the Bench, which includes many more stories about Woodrow\u2019s last years and beyond.<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido4.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
Woodrow on the Bench: Life Lessons from a Wise Old Dog by Jenna Blum. Hardcover<\/strong>; amazon.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Design a garden marker<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
A bench may not be practical for everyone, but a similar approach is a stone. You can get a stone in the shape of your dog to put under a favorite sunning spot. You can get a stepping stone, perhaps in the shape of a heart, with the names of pets who have crossed over.<\/p>\n
Axel had a stretch in the backyard that he ran along often
\nenough to make a path, so we opted to create a row of pavers that showcased it. It\u2019s just a section of pavers, there\u2019s no start or end, which we view as our never-ending love for him.<\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido5-600x501.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
Close to Her Heart Personalization Garden Stone<\/strong>; personalizationmall.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Ink a memory<\/h2>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
This one, too, isn\u2019t for everyone, but another way to memorialize a pet is perhaps the ultimate artwork \u2014 a tattoo. Tattoos of pets can include portraits, paw prints or your dog\u2019s name.<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido6-600x465.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
Dogster editor\u2019s husband, Scott Andresen, got this tattoo in memory of their dog Justice who passed away, based off of a favorite photo.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Create a special Spot<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
\u201cI have had the honor of attending a number of special tree planting services honoring a pet or pets that serves as a way to allow our beloved pets to live on in a meaningful way,\u201d says Maryglenn, who is also the founder and owner of Paws to Remember, a pet aftercare company that serves grieving pet owners in their time of need.<\/p>\n
Still others create a section of their backyard to plant flowers and include a statue of St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals, as a place to sit and reminisce about their dog. You can also get a pawprint mold and display that as part of the tribute.<\/p>\n
While a garden is lovely, that special spot can also be indoors with something as simple as a keepsake box or memorial shelf. Rev. Kaleel suggests, \u201cCreating a special memorial in the house with the dog\u2019s leash, favorite toy, photographs, perhaps, and other objects that give the pet parent a place to go and be especially close to their departed, beloved animal companion.\u201d<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido7-600x413.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
The Vault Pet Keepsake Box<\/strong>; savor.us<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Make art from the heart<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
While few things capture a pet\u2019s likeness as a clear, in-focus photograph, there are many media that go beyond that. An art director friend of mine, for example, did an Illustrator image of our Medusa (above) that we had printed on a canvas. It was based on a photo of her and we display it proudly in our home. You can also get pillows, watercolor portraits, a mug, etc. to keep a visual of your pet, along with the many memories you shared, close at hand.<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido8-600x516.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
Commission a piece of art from a local artist.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Create a Mini Me<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Another form of remembrance is a custom-created animal made in your pet\u2019s likeness. This is a very cool idea, which you may want to act on before your pet passes. I know for myself, I\u2019d need to let some time pass before getting one after the fact; as I mentioned with those Facebook memories, sometimes things are just \u201ctoo soon.\u201d And, again, only you can determine what is right for you \u2014 there is no single correct approach!<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido9-572x600.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
Needle Felted Custom Dogs<\/strong>; @faccidesigns<\/em><\/a> and faccidesigns.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Do a good deed<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
A donation on behalf of your dog is a very special way to honor her while also helping other dogs in need. \u201cI do this whenever a friend\u2019s pet dies,\u201d Jenna says. \u201cIt\u2019s such a lovely legacy that allows them to live on while helping other animals.\u201d Options could include the rescue organization where you got your dog, a group dedicated specifically to your dog\u2019s breed or one just for senior pets, like Grey Muzzle<\/a>, which has a special \u201cin memory of\u201d donation section.<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido10.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
\u00a9Getty Images<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Grieve without judgment<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
\u201cNo two people grieve the same; some grieving owners want community and ceremony, while others want to be left alone,\u201d Maryglenn says. \u201cI do think it is important to keep that in mind when honoring a loved one\u2019s pet.\u201d<\/p>\n
Rev. Kaleel says he knows people who, 30 years after the death of their pet, still mourn and miss them.<\/p>\n
\u201cI want people to know tears are sacred. Grief is healthy. Many people I work with tell me they grieved more deeply for the death of their pet than when their parent or friend or relative died,\u201d he says. \u201cYes, that\u2019s true because the love between us and our pets is without betrayal, complexity, judgment \u2014 the stuff that complicates and corrodes human relationships. Yet, so often, the heartbreak we feel at the death of our pet leads directly back to un-mourned losses in a person\u2019s life. I see it almost all the time. The tears never shed at Dad\u2019s passing are shed at the dog\u2019s passing.\u201d<\/p>\n
If you have a friend who is grieving for a pet, don\u2019t worry too much about doing or saying the wrong thing. \u201cAs a friend, to acknowledge and honor the love someone shared with a pet is a wonderful way to say \u2018I care,\u2019 and \u2018I, too, want to help you honor the life and love you shared,\u2019\u201d Coleen says. \u201cWhen a pet parent is in grief with a shattered heart, having a friend be a caring voice with a helping hand is so heartwarming. And, if nothing else, \u2018just be\u2019 with the person who\u2019s had the loss and listen to their stories. The gift of presence in that manner means the world!\u201d<\/p>\n
No matter how big or small your dog is, when he passes, he leaves behind a huge void. Grieving is a deeply personal process. Whenever you\u2019re ready, some of these memorialization ideas can create a tangible form of the many memories in your heart.<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido11-600x553.jpg.optimal.jpg\")
\u00a9stonena7 | Getty Images<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n Create a bucket list<\/h3>\n
Many of us are familiar with people creating a bucket list of things to do before they pass on. They might include go to Paris, drive a race car or meet Brad Pitt. As with everything else, our companions have far lower aspirations, which makes it even easier to create a bucket list to delight your dog.<\/p>\n
Consider the following treats or experiences when you know you will have to say goodbye soon:<\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Trip to the dog park<\/strong> \u2013 borrow a wagon if your senior dog isn\u2019t so mobile<\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Day at the beach<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Playdate with some of your dog\u2019s besties<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Tasty table scraps<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Trips through the drive-through for a burger or other snack<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Chocolate<\/strong>, the ultimate forbidden delight. In fact, some veterinary clinics have a jar of \u201cGoodbye Kisses\u201d in the rooms where pet parents say their final goodbyes as a way to give their dogs something special at the very end.<\/p>\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/s36700.pcdn.co\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/02\/fido-create-a-bucket-list-600x501.png\")
\u00a9vejaaa | Getty Images<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n Celebrate a Life Event<\/h3>\n
\u201cFor many, a memorial service or celebration of a pet\u2019s life can be an important, meaningful part of the grieving process,\u201d says Maryglenn Warnock, a certified pet bereavement counselor and ordained pet funeral officiant\/pet chaplain who currently serves on the advisory board of Old Friends Senior Dog Sanctuary, on the board of the Nashville Humane Association, and Pet Community Center.<\/p>\n
Maryglenn experienced this firsthand when planning a celebration of life for her beloved Old English Sheepdog, Garcia. \u201cCelebrating Garcia\u2019s life with people who knew him and loved him meant the absolute world to me \u2014 and it is an honor and a privilege to be able to help others who are in that same position. Maryglenn offers the following tips for planning a memorial:<\/p>\n
Pick a spot. <\/strong>Whether an outdoor space, a home or other location, honoring the memory of a beloved companion in a place that holds special significance can add a meaningful dimension to a service.<\/p>\n
Create a guest list.<\/strong> Take some time to think of the many lives your pet touched \u2014 neighbors, friends, dog walkers, veterinarians and staff, co-workers, groomers, pet sitters, etc. There are plenty of well-intentioned people who don\u2019t understand the significance of losing a pet (and there are also non-well-intentioned people who are quick to judge). When making the guest list, I recommend not inviting the people who fall into either category. Their presence at such an event can be hurtful. This event is a way to promote healing, and people who are not sympathetic to your mourning have no place there.<\/p>\n
Give children a role.<\/strong> Letting children take part in a ceremony can be tremendously healing, as it allows them space to acknowledge their loss, and also allows them to learn how to grieve in a positive, healthy way.<\/p>\n
Speak.<\/strong> Be prepared to say a few words if you are up to it. There is something incredibly moving about hearing an owner talk about memories of his or her beloved pet. I typically encourage owners to at least spend a portion of a service sharing their personal reflections.<\/p>\n
Include an officiant.<\/strong> Just as there are officiants for human services, there are also people, such as myself, who serve as pet officiants. I think there is no greater honor than having a pet owner trust me with this important role. Delivering a meaningful, personalized eulogy for every pet is a role I absolutely cherish.<\/p>\n
Do what resonates.<\/strong> Remember that it is OK to celebrate, or cry \u2014 or both. The word \u201cfuneral\u201d strikes fear in the heart of many, as it conjures up images of discomfort, sadness, sorrow, etc. But a pet funeral, or a human funeral for that matter, doesn\u2019t need to be somber. The event can be celebratory, joyful, touching, inspiring \u2014 whatever resonates with the owner.<\/p>\n
Know that there are no rules.<\/strong> For human funerals, there is a trend toward celebrating a life in a unique way. Similarly, a memorial service for a pet can be structured in such a way that feels right to the owner. There is no rule that says the event has to take place immediately after a pet\u2019s death. Additionally, there are no rules for the service itself. It can be somber or lighthearted. It can be religious or not religious. It can take place day or night, in a place that feels right to the owner.<\/p>\n
The post Remembering Fido<\/a> by Elizabeth Anderson Lopez<\/a> appeared first on Dogster<\/a>. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren’t considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Dogster.com.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<\/p>\n
The post Remembering Fido<\/a> by Elizabeth Anderson Lopez<\/a> appeared first on Dogster<\/a>. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren’t considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Dogster.com.<\/p>\n
Every dog owner will someday experience a time of sorrow that, hopefully, occurs after years of joy with our beloved dogs. While nothing can speed up the healing process \u2014 which, indeed, is a process, not something one magically \u201cgets over\u201d after a certain amount of time \u2014 many have found memorializing their dog to be comforting.<\/p>\n
There is absolutely no single, right way to do this, reminds Reverend Kaleel Sakakeeny, an animal chaplain and credentialed pet loss and grief counselor in Boston. \u201cEach of us mourns and memorializes in his or her own way depending on so many factors from faith, religion, intensity of the human-animal bond, stage of life the pet parent is in, how the pet passed, etc.\u201d<\/p>\n
Again, take your time and do what feels right to you. \u201cAnd it definitely is a process \u2014 and not one that is always linear. It\u2019s critical for the healing process to move from grief to mourning, which is externalizing\/memorializing the pain and sadness so we can begin to move forward. NEVER to move on; to move forward,\u201d adds Rev. Kaleel, who is also a professional life coach.<\/p>\n
- \n
- \n
Incorporate ashes<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Over the years it has become more common to keep the ashes of a beloved pet, as well as using some of the ashes to create different memorial items.<\/p>\n
\u201cUrns and urn jewelry seem to be what most people think about,\u201d says Coleen Ellis, a pet loss author, consultant and speaker who oversees Two Hearts Pet Loss Center in Texas, but options don\u2019t end there. \u201cOutside rock urns, mixing ashes with Let Your Love Grow to create a very nutrient-rich product for flowers and trees, portraits painted using the pet\u2019s ashes or even shooting the pet\u2019s ashes into space or turning the pet\u2019s ashes into a coral reef for the ocean are some beautiful and creative ideas.\u201d<\/p>\n
Rev. Kaleel offers a caveat to consider. \u201cI advise not to spread all the ashes because we move, change locations and don\u2019t want all the pet\u2019s ashes somewhere else. People have been grateful for this guidance. We need to keep the ashes with us, some of them anyway, and having spread ashes far and wide can leave us bereft.\u201d<\/p>\n
PetBar Pendant<\/strong> (hollowed pendant that holds cremains)<\/em>; remembarcollection.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Craft a jewel<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
There are many different ways jewelry can include part of your pet. Options can include turning the ashes into a diamond, creating jewelry with the pet\u2019s nose or paw print on it or wearing a locket with your dog\u2019s photo or a tuft of fur, perhaps even engraved with his name or initial.<\/p>\n
Teeny Tiny Paw Necklace<\/strong>; pawsomecouture.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Picture a memory<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Doubtless, you have lots of pictures of your dog. Many different companies print a photo book that you can fill with images, as well as stories about your dog \u2014 funny things he did, all his nicknames or who his favorite furry friends were. I created one of these for our dog Medusa through Costco\u2019s photo site (above, left). You can find photo books at Shutterfly, Minted, Personalization Mall or shops on Etsy. You can also go smaller scale and get a personalized frame for your absolutely favorite photo.<\/p>\n
As with any of the items on this list, don\u2019t pressure yourself to take on a photo-based project. As I\u2019ve experienced with those Facebook Memories, seeing images from years ago of either our beloved dogs Axel or Medusa sometimes makes me smile; sometimes they make my eyes sweaty. I created the Medusa photo book for my husband for Father\u2019s Day, which was about six months after she passed. It took him a long time to actually be able to look through it; don\u2019t be offended if the recipient of a photo, or any gift, is on a different bereavement timetable than you.<\/p>\n
Create and print a book with images and stories about your dog.<\/em> \u00a0Above created through Costco\u2019s photo site<\/strong>; costcophotocenter.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n Without You Custom Photo Art by Sara Hicks Malone<\/strong>;\u2004minted.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Hold a memorial service<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
\u201cWith increasing frequency, I am finding that many grieving pet owners are open to the concept of hosting a memorial or a celebration of life for a pet,\u201d says Maryglenn Warnock, a certified pet bereavement counselor and ordained pet funeral officiant\/pet chaplain based in Nashville. \u201cI have long questioned why we celebrate our human companions after death but typically don\u2019t celebrate our furry companions. I know I am not alone in my belief that pets are family, too.\u201d<\/p>\n
Coleen concurs, also embracing the model many follow for humans. \u201cAbsolutely, rituals are one of the most powerful ways to honor not only a life and love shared but to bring people together who might have also loved the pet. I believe in the power of what we do for humans: a visitation or wake. Taking time during the service to remember the special moments, share photos, have a toast \u2026 whatever it was the family did together throughout the life of the animal is the perfect thing to do for a service or to share with the eulogy. Get the entire family involved.\u201d<\/p>\n
Jenna Blum, Boston-based bestselling author, found herself getting her entire neighborhood involved. \u201cWhen my black Lab, Woodrow, passed at age 15, we had a memorial for him about a week after, on the bench across the street from our downtown Boston apartment where he and I spent much of his last seven months. We had Woodrow\u2019s photo in a frame, LED candles, champagne to celebrate his life, bacon\u2014because he loved it\u2014and many beautiful ladies, just as Woodrow, the \u2018George Clooney of Dogs\u2019 would have wanted, singing Amazing Grace and reading poetry for him. Days later, the photo and candles were still there \u2014 and people left flowers, rocks and notes for him, like \u2018Dear Woodrow and family, we will miss seeing you here at the bench!\u2019 I saved them all.\u201d<\/p>\n
As part of her healing process, Jenna wrote Woodrow on the Bench, which includes many more stories about Woodrow\u2019s last years and beyond.<\/p>\n
Woodrow on the Bench: Life Lessons from a Wise Old Dog by Jenna Blum. Hardcover<\/strong>; amazon.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Design a garden marker<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
A bench may not be practical for everyone, but a similar approach is a stone. You can get a stone in the shape of your dog to put under a favorite sunning spot. You can get a stepping stone, perhaps in the shape of a heart, with the names of pets who have crossed over.<\/p>\n
Axel had a stretch in the backyard that he ran along often
\nenough to make a path, so we opted to create a row of pavers that showcased it. It\u2019s just a section of pavers, there\u2019s no start or end, which we view as our never-ending love for him.<\/p>\nClose to Her Heart Personalization Garden Stone<\/strong>; personalizationmall.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Ink a memory<\/h2>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
This one, too, isn\u2019t for everyone, but another way to memorialize a pet is perhaps the ultimate artwork \u2014 a tattoo. Tattoos of pets can include portraits, paw prints or your dog\u2019s name.<\/p>\n
Dogster editor\u2019s husband, Scott Andresen, got this tattoo in memory of their dog Justice who passed away, based off of a favorite photo.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Create a special Spot<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
\u201cI have had the honor of attending a number of special tree planting services honoring a pet or pets that serves as a way to allow our beloved pets to live on in a meaningful way,\u201d says Maryglenn, who is also the founder and owner of Paws to Remember, a pet aftercare company that serves grieving pet owners in their time of need.<\/p>\n
Still others create a section of their backyard to plant flowers and include a statue of St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals, as a place to sit and reminisce about their dog. You can also get a pawprint mold and display that as part of the tribute.<\/p>\n
While a garden is lovely, that special spot can also be indoors with something as simple as a keepsake box or memorial shelf. Rev. Kaleel suggests, \u201cCreating a special memorial in the house with the dog\u2019s leash, favorite toy, photographs, perhaps, and other objects that give the pet parent a place to go and be especially close to their departed, beloved animal companion.\u201d<\/p>\n
The Vault Pet Keepsake Box<\/strong>; savor.us<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Make art from the heart<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
While few things capture a pet\u2019s likeness as a clear, in-focus photograph, there are many media that go beyond that. An art director friend of mine, for example, did an Illustrator image of our Medusa (above) that we had printed on a canvas. It was based on a photo of her and we display it proudly in our home. You can also get pillows, watercolor portraits, a mug, etc. to keep a visual of your pet, along with the many memories you shared, close at hand.<\/p>\n
Commission a piece of art from a local artist.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
- \n
Create a Mini Me<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
Another form of remembrance is a custom-created animal made in your pet\u2019s likeness. This is a very cool idea, which you may want to act on before your pet passes. I know for myself, I\u2019d need to let some time pass before getting one after the fact; as I mentioned with those Facebook memories, sometimes things are just \u201ctoo soon.\u201d And, again, only you can determine what is right for you \u2014 there is no single correct approach!<\/p>\n
Needle Felted Custom Dogs<\/strong>; @faccidesigns<\/em><\/a> and faccidesigns.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
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Do a good deed<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
A donation on behalf of your dog is a very special way to honor her while also helping other dogs in need. \u201cI do this whenever a friend\u2019s pet dies,\u201d Jenna says. \u201cIt\u2019s such a lovely legacy that allows them to live on while helping other animals.\u201d Options could include the rescue organization where you got your dog, a group dedicated specifically to your dog\u2019s breed or one just for senior pets, like Grey Muzzle<\/a>, which has a special \u201cin memory of\u201d donation section.<\/p>\n
\u00a9Getty Images<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n - \n
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Grieve without judgment<\/h3>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
\u201cNo two people grieve the same; some grieving owners want community and ceremony, while others want to be left alone,\u201d Maryglenn says. \u201cI do think it is important to keep that in mind when honoring a loved one\u2019s pet.\u201d<\/p>\n
Rev. Kaleel says he knows people who, 30 years after the death of their pet, still mourn and miss them.<\/p>\n
\u201cI want people to know tears are sacred. Grief is healthy. Many people I work with tell me they grieved more deeply for the death of their pet than when their parent or friend or relative died,\u201d he says. \u201cYes, that\u2019s true because the love between us and our pets is without betrayal, complexity, judgment \u2014 the stuff that complicates and corrodes human relationships. Yet, so often, the heartbreak we feel at the death of our pet leads directly back to un-mourned losses in a person\u2019s life. I see it almost all the time. The tears never shed at Dad\u2019s passing are shed at the dog\u2019s passing.\u201d<\/p>\n
If you have a friend who is grieving for a pet, don\u2019t worry too much about doing or saying the wrong thing. \u201cAs a friend, to acknowledge and honor the love someone shared with a pet is a wonderful way to say \u2018I care,\u2019 and \u2018I, too, want to help you honor the life and love you shared,\u2019\u201d Coleen says. \u201cWhen a pet parent is in grief with a shattered heart, having a friend be a caring voice with a helping hand is so heartwarming. And, if nothing else, \u2018just be\u2019 with the person who\u2019s had the loss and listen to their stories. The gift of presence in that manner means the world!\u201d<\/p>\n
No matter how big or small your dog is, when he passes, he leaves behind a huge void. Grieving is a deeply personal process. Whenever you\u2019re ready, some of these memorialization ideas can create a tangible form of the many memories in your heart.<\/p>\n
\u00a9stonena7 | Getty Images<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n Create a bucket list<\/h3>\n
Many of us are familiar with people creating a bucket list of things to do before they pass on. They might include go to Paris, drive a race car or meet Brad Pitt. As with everything else, our companions have far lower aspirations, which makes it even easier to create a bucket list to delight your dog.<\/p>\n
Consider the following treats or experiences when you know you will have to say goodbye soon:<\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Trip to the dog park<\/strong> \u2013 borrow a wagon if your senior dog isn\u2019t so mobile<\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Day at the beach<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Playdate with some of your dog\u2019s besties<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Tasty table scraps<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Trips through the drive-through for a burger or other snack<\/strong><\/p>\n
\u2724\u00a0Chocolate<\/strong>, the ultimate forbidden delight. In fact, some veterinary clinics have a jar of \u201cGoodbye Kisses\u201d in the rooms where pet parents say their final goodbyes as a way to give their dogs something special at the very end.<\/p>\n
\u00a9vejaaa | Getty Images<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n Celebrate a Life Event<\/h3>\n
\u201cFor many, a memorial service or celebration of a pet\u2019s life can be an important, meaningful part of the grieving process,\u201d says Maryglenn Warnock, a certified pet bereavement counselor and ordained pet funeral officiant\/pet chaplain who currently serves on the advisory board of Old Friends Senior Dog Sanctuary, on the board of the Nashville Humane Association, and Pet Community Center.<\/p>\n
Maryglenn experienced this firsthand when planning a celebration of life for her beloved Old English Sheepdog, Garcia. \u201cCelebrating Garcia\u2019s life with people who knew him and loved him meant the absolute world to me \u2014 and it is an honor and a privilege to be able to help others who are in that same position. Maryglenn offers the following tips for planning a memorial:<\/p>\n
Pick a spot. <\/strong>Whether an outdoor space, a home or other location, honoring the memory of a beloved companion in a place that holds special significance can add a meaningful dimension to a service.<\/p>\n
Create a guest list.<\/strong> Take some time to think of the many lives your pet touched \u2014 neighbors, friends, dog walkers, veterinarians and staff, co-workers, groomers, pet sitters, etc. There are plenty of well-intentioned people who don\u2019t understand the significance of losing a pet (and there are also non-well-intentioned people who are quick to judge). When making the guest list, I recommend not inviting the people who fall into either category. Their presence at such an event can be hurtful. This event is a way to promote healing, and people who are not sympathetic to your mourning have no place there.<\/p>\n
Give children a role.<\/strong> Letting children take part in a ceremony can be tremendously healing, as it allows them space to acknowledge their loss, and also allows them to learn how to grieve in a positive, healthy way.<\/p>\n
Speak.<\/strong> Be prepared to say a few words if you are up to it. There is something incredibly moving about hearing an owner talk about memories of his or her beloved pet. I typically encourage owners to at least spend a portion of a service sharing their personal reflections.<\/p>\n
Include an officiant.<\/strong> Just as there are officiants for human services, there are also people, such as myself, who serve as pet officiants. I think there is no greater honor than having a pet owner trust me with this important role. Delivering a meaningful, personalized eulogy for every pet is a role I absolutely cherish.<\/p>\n
Do what resonates.<\/strong> Remember that it is OK to celebrate, or cry \u2014 or both. The word \u201cfuneral\u201d strikes fear in the heart of many, as it conjures up images of discomfort, sadness, sorrow, etc. But a pet funeral, or a human funeral for that matter, doesn\u2019t need to be somber. The event can be celebratory, joyful, touching, inspiring \u2014 whatever resonates with the owner.<\/p>\n
Know that there are no rules.<\/strong> For human funerals, there is a trend toward celebrating a life in a unique way. Similarly, a memorial service for a pet can be structured in such a way that feels right to the owner. There is no rule that says the event has to take place immediately after a pet\u2019s death. Additionally, there are no rules for the service itself. It can be somber or lighthearted. It can be religious or not religious. It can take place day or night, in a place that feels right to the owner.<\/p>\n
The post Remembering Fido<\/a> by Elizabeth Anderson Lopez<\/a> appeared first on Dogster<\/a>. Copying over entire articles infringes on copyright laws. You may not be aware of it, but all of these articles were assigned, contracted and paid for, so they aren’t considered public domain. However, we appreciate that you like the article and would love it if you continued sharing just the first paragraph of an article, then linking out to the rest of the piece on Dogster.com.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
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